Photo: Jamie Otis/Instagram
Jamie OtisandDoug Hehnerare counting their blessings despite the hardships they’ve endured.
On the newest episode of theirHot Marriage Cool Parentspodcast, out Wednesday, theMarried at First Sightalums opened up about the barrage of emotions surrounding the 2016 loss of their first child: sonJohnathan Edward, whom they lost when Otis, 32, was four months pregnant.
Hehner, 35, recalls the aftermath that included a period of questioning, when the couple would “look for reasons of why it happened” while they were grieving.
“Evenwhen the doctors tell you that it’smore common or it’s kind of a fluke, you don’t necessarily want to believe that,” he said. “You want to find a reason. You want to at least make sure that this wouldn’t happen again or shouldn’t happen again.”
“You realize that there’s just a lot of things that are out of your control and as much as you want things to go right, you start to prepare for all situations,” Hehner explained. “It was such a dramatic turnfrom pregnancy and happiness.”
Despite the tragic circumstances, Otis considers the experience a “mixed blessing” due to the outpouring of support she and Hehner received following the loss of their son.
“At first it was just nothing but excruciating, but then when I would have women reach out to me and share their stories … itjust made me feel so much less aloneand it made me feel less at fault,” she said. “I did feel at fault — even if you know in your head that, ‘No, you should not feel at fault, you did nothing wrong,’ you still wonder, ‘Did I do something wrong? Could I have done something differently?’ ”
“It just felt so good to hear other women come to me and say, ‘Hey, listen, this happened to me too.’ And honestly, the best thing that I could have ever heardwas a story about rainbow babies,” Otis continued. “That gave me so much hope and I was like, ‘Why do us women not share our stories with each other?’ ”
Hot Marriage Cool Parentsepisode 4 isavailable now on iTunesand forAndroid.
source: people.com
